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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29599341">Watermelon Sugar</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hihoneyimdead/pseuds/Hihoneyimdead'>Hihoneyimdead</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Alternate Universe - Assassins &amp; Hitmen, Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Getting Together, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, nothing happens on screen though</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 02:08:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,325</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29599341</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hihoneyimdead/pseuds/Hihoneyimdead</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kiyoomi is hired to assassinate the crown prince of Inarizaki. Unfortunately, the prince is hot, and Kiyoomi is a weaker man than he wishes he was.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>160</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>So beautiful It makes me want to cry</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Watermelon Sugar</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Prompts from @sktsfluffweek on twitter</p><p>Day 7 - Royalty AU</p><p>-</p><p>A/N: </p><p>Things to look out for in this fic include: knives, mentioned nudity, implied sexual content (which does not happen on screen), and mentions of death. </p><p>But this is also a fluff fic, and a comedy of sorts, so nothing really happens beyond mentions.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The prince sleeps naked.</p><p>Suddenly, Kiyoomi wishes he had brought the bleach with him after all. He would rather go blind than have to kill a naked man. Especially a naked man cuddling an entire watermelon for some ungodly reason. It’s February. Where did he get a watermelon from.</p><p>He flips the knife in his hand, catches it by the tip, and holds it up, angling it just right. The watermelon complicates things. As does the nakedness. It’s just- distracting. Very distracting. </p><p>Kiyoomi is going to kill his cousin for setting him up for this job. </p><p>It was supposed to be easy. The prince is known for refusing any guards in his bedroom, probably because of the muscles Kiyoomi is currently having a difficult time not looking at. On vacation away from the royal palace, it was a job too easy to pass up. Five hundred thousand gold pieces for the prince’s head. That could buy so many dinners. So many replacement pairs of gloves. </p><p>The prince mumbles and rolls over onto his other side, bringing the watermelon with him. Kiyoomi ducks behind a pillar, just in case. After a moment, the noises settle, and Kiyoomi lets out the breath he didn’t know he was holding and adjusts the grip on his knife. One shot, then out the window. </p><p>He steps out from behind the pillar and is met with a watermelon with a smiley face painted on it. </p><p>“You’re not supposed to be in here,” the prince says. He’s smiling, teeth a brilliant white in the moonlight. He’s still naked. He doesn’t look like he minds. </p><p>Kiyoomi looks from his face to the watermelon’s, then back up, absolutely not looking down. “Why do you have a watermelon?”</p><p>It’s an honest question, and one he would like answered before he jumps out the window and breaks his ankles. </p><p>The prince shrugs. “It was a gift. Why do you have a knife?”</p><p>Is he stupid? </p><p>“Because I am trying to kill you,” Kiyoomi slowly says. </p><p>“Yeah, no, I figured. Just wanted to make sure.”</p><p>Kiyoomi blinks. He frowns. He can feel the straps of his mask tighten around his ears, and he can feel a sudden surge of laughter bubble up that he does his best to repress. </p><p>The prince looks at him. He looks at the prince. They both look down at the watermelon, who looks indifferent to the whole situation. </p><p>“His name is Rin,” the prince says.</p><p>“Lovely.”</p><p>“Named him after the guy who gave him to me.”</p><p>“Did you, now?”</p><p>“Yep. If you’re gonna kill me, you’ll have to go through him first.”</p><p>“Watermelon Rin or Human Rin?”</p><p>Again, it’s a fair question, and one that Kiyoomi would like answered. His knives are meant for human flesh, not watermelon rind. He doesn’t want to bend them out of shape. </p><p>“I mean, Human Rin’s next door with my brother if you want me to get him for you,” the prince offers. “No sweat off my back.”</p><p>Kiyoomi wishes he hadn’t mentioned his back. It’s just as muscular as the rest of him, and Kiyoomi may have gotten a bit caught up in its majesty upon first entering the room. </p><p>“You really should guard your room better,” Kiyoomi says. He slowly begins backing up towards the window. Komori is waiting below disguised as a guard in case Kiyoomi needs extra backup. </p><p>He may need extra backup. </p><p>The prince shrugs again. “No point. No one usually gets this far. I’m kinda impressed, honestly.”</p><p>“I’m very good at what I do,” Kiyoomi says, because it’s true. He is one of the best three assassins in the nation, supposedly, and he believes it. “You’re lucky I’m the one trying to kill you tonight. The others aren’t nearly as lenient towards watermelons.”</p><p>Towards watermelons, that’s right. Not towards beautifully-sculpted idiot princes. </p><p>“I guess you’re right,” the prince says. He makes no move to stop Kiyoomi. “May I know the name of the man trying to assassinate me tonight?”</p><p>Absolutely not, Kiyoomi wants to say.</p><p>“Weasel,” he says instead. He mentally slaps himself. Komori is going to slap him in five minutes. “Guard yourself better. I won’t be the only one trying to kill you this week.”</p><p>“Oh, I’m sure.” The prince waves, and Kiyoomi imagines the watermelon doing so as well. “Have a good night, Weasel-kun.”</p><p>Kiyoomi awkwardly waves back and jumps out the window backwards, twisting around so he lands properly in a crouching position.</p><p>The only guard in the area looks around before helping him up. “How did it go? I heard talking.”</p><p>Kiyoomi just shakes his head and walks away, Komori quickly on his tail.</p><p> </p><p>Ushijima is not interested in the job. Neither is Kiryuu, leaving it to Kiyoomi to kill the prince before the end of the week.</p><p>With a sigh and a bottle of bleach in a pouch on his belt, Kiyoomi clambers back through the prince’s window for the second night in a row and immediately wants to jump back out again. </p><p>“Omi-kun, hi!” The prince waves, blankets pooled around his waist. </p><p>“Huh,” Kiyoomi says. Then it hits him, and he lunges for the prince and pulls a knife off of his belt, pinning him to the bed and pressing the knife against his throat in one swift move. “What did you just call me?”</p><p>The prince, not looking at all bothered by the situation, gingerly taps the knife. Kiyoomi narrows his eyes, but lifts it slightly. </p><p>“Omi-kun,” he says, voice quiet. “I did some looking today. You’re easier to track down than you’d think.”</p><p>Kiyoomi thinks. Who would- ah.</p><p>“Bokuto,” he flatly says.</p><p>“Was that his name?” The prince innocently asks. “Spiky hair, loud as hell, kinda dumb?”</p><p>“Very dumb,” Kiyoomi corrects. He sits up, still straddling the prince and still very much in charge, thank you. “What did he tell you?”</p><p>“Just that you’re Omi-kun and you go through a lot of gloves.” The prince props himself up onto his elbows and tilts his head. “You know, for a secretive assassin organization, you’re not very good at being secretive. I literally just had to go to the tavern by the river.”</p><p>If Kiyoomi had any say in the matter, he would never have agreed to join the assassin’s guild. But the health benefits and Komori’s want to see the world beyond the capital had convinced him. The guild grants him a free visit to the apothecary once a month, and a guaranteed visit with a doctor once a year. And the city is nice, anyway, if one looks past the filth and refuse and, wait, why is the prince vacationing here, again? </p><p>“My name isn’t Omi-kun,” Kiyoomi says for lack of anything better to say. Is he pouting? Absolutely not. He’s a hardened assassin. He does not pout. </p><p>The prince nods. “Right, Weasel-kun, you’re right.”</p><p>“Weasel is just a codename, idiot.”</p><p>“It’s a fucking stupid one. You know what weasels are related to? Squirrels. We hunt squirrels. We eat squirrels.”</p><p>“You eat squirrels?” Kiyoomi asks, feeling somewhat sickened at the notion. “They’re disgusting.”</p><p>The prince rolls his eyes. “They aren’t that bad.”</p><p>“They’re filthy. Please tell me that you clean them properly first. Do you know how many diseases you can get from cooking and cleaning an animal incorrectly?”</p><p>“Y’know, you seem to care an awful lot about my health considering you’re trying to kill me,” the prince comments. “Who’s putting you up to this, anyway? It’s not Oikawa again, is it?”</p><p>Kiyoomi neither knows who Oikawa is, nor does he care. </p><p>He looks at his knife, at the prince’s (bare, open, bare, tempting) neck, and swaps that knife out for a slightly clunkier one with a flick of the wrist. The prince’s eyes widen comically. </p><p>“Holy shit, that’s cool,” the prince says, sounding almost awed. “Can you show me how to do that?”</p><p>“What? No. I’m going to kill you.”</p><p>“Ugh, you’re no fun.” The prince pouts, properly pouts, and Kiyoomi, unbelievably, feels a little bad. “Whatever. Do it quick. ‘Samu’s supposed to come check on me in a couple minutes, and-”</p><p>‘Samu? Wait. </p><p>Kiyoomi pulls the job notice out from the inside of his vest and looks at it, then at the prince, then back at it again. </p><p>“Miya Osamu?” he asks, already knowing the answer. Of course. </p><p>The prince shakes his head, a hint of a smirk on his face. “Miya Atsumu. Don’t tell me you’re trying to kill the wrong prince here, Omi-kun. Aren’t you supposed to be the best of the best?”</p><p>“This is ridiculous,” Kiyoomi announces. He puts his knife and the notice away and climbs off of the bed, adjusting his gloves as he does so. He is not disappointed at leaving, and not relieved at the notion of not having to kill this particular prince. At all. “I need to clear this up.”</p><p>“Tomorrow, then?” Prince Atsumu asks, sounding all too enthusiastic about it.</p><p>“Definitely not,” Kiyoomi answers, already trying to figure out if the guards will swap the twin princes’ rooms around now that one of them knows there is a hit out on the other. He’s betting they won’t, just because they might try some of that double psychology bullshit Kiyoomi has been hearing so much about. </p><p> </p><p>“Goddamnit,” Kiyoomi says. </p><p>“Good evening to you, too,” Atsumu says. He’s spread across the bed upside-down, thankfully clothed tonight, though his tunic is open down to his navel and his chest is very much ridiculously exposed. “So, who’s got the hit out on my brother?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” Kiyoomi replies. He already has a leg out the window and is bracing himself for the ledge climb next door. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I- hey!”</p><p>He yelps as he’s tugged into the room and against Atsumu’s chest. He’s taller than the prince, so it’s a bit awkward. He smells like cinnamon. Kiyoomi inexplicably wants a cinnamon roll from the bakery nearest the tavern. </p><p>“Nope! No murder tonight!” Atsumu announces. He pulls Kiyoomi back to the bed and drops him on it, sitting on his lap much the same way Kiyoomi was on him the previous night. Oh, gods. He smiles down at Kiyoomi, still as brilliant as the first night they met. “I can’t let it happen, sorry.”</p><p>Kiyoomi swallows a lump in his throat and slowly moves his hands up beside his head as a gesture of peace and goodwill. “You’re stronger than you look.”</p><p>“Am I?” Atsumu asks. He looks down at his biceps and shakes his head. “Nah. You’re just weak.”</p><p>Kiyoomi scowls, face slowly turning red. This is awful. Horrible. For many reasons, not just that he is being straddled by the most attractive man he’s ever had the misfortune of encountering. </p><p>“Weak?” he asks, voice low. “<em>Weak? </em>I’ll show you weak.”</p><p>He grips Atsumu’s arms and flips him over his head, launching himself along with him and pinning him to the floor. Atsumu’s head hits the stone with a crack and he yelps, eyes and mouth going wide. Kiyoomi grabs one of his arms and holds it above his head. He presses the tip of his knife against Atsumu’s throat hard enough to draw tiny beads of blood with the other arm, pressing his knee into Atsumu’s groin. It’s sloppy, but usually gets the job done. </p><p>“Listen to me, asshole,” Kiyoomi hisses, eyes narrowed and knife slowly pressing harder into Atsumu’s throat. “I am an assassin. You are a prince. The dumbest motherfucker I’ve ever met, and I work with Bokuto on a regular basis. You think you can keep me from doing my job? I have never, <em>ever </em>failed a mission before, and this will not be the first, do you hear me?”</p><p>Atsumu blinks wordlessly. </p><p>Kiyoomi stares into his eyes for a moment, feeling just the tiniest bit guilty. Oh. Oh no. Puppy eyes. He absolutely knows what he’s doing, the bastard. </p><p>Kiyoomi weighs his options. Kill them both and the supposed Human Rin sleeping with the actual target next door, and leave and get the five hundred thousand gold pieces. Retire in peace. Or… no, that’s stupid. Idiotic. Moronic. Out of character, and something Komori would slap him for. </p><p>He sighs and pulls his knife away, wipes it on a towel on his belt and slips it away out of sight. Atsumu slowly begins to smile as Kiyoomi lets go of him and stands, adjusting his mask where it began to slip off of his nose in the brief scuffle. </p><p>“One night,” Kiyoomi says, feeling heavier and heavier with every breath he takes. He walks to the window and stops with one foot on the windowsill. “You don’t tell him that I came tonight. In return, I find out who put out the hit on your brother for you. If I don’t, then I kill your brother. But if I do, then I give the information to you and you do with it what you will. Do we have a deal?”</p><p>He turns to look at Atsumu, feeling more like a romance novel hero than he looks, all in black with bloodstained boots and a cape that’s seen better days. It billows in the wind, though, and he supposes that the mask could make him look… this doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter if Atsumu thinks he’s hot. </p><p>He poses a bit more, anyway. </p><p>Atsumu seems to consider the deal for a moment before looking at Kiyoomi curiously. “You’re the weirdest assassin I’ve ever heard of.”</p><p>“Yeah, well, I wasn’t always an assassin. We all start somewhere.” Kiyoomi looks down at the floor. “Do we have a deal or not?”</p><p>“Yeah, we have a deal. One night, got it.”</p><p>Kiyoomi is halfway out the window when Atsumu softly says, “Hey, Omi-kun, just so you know, I don’t hold this against you. A job’s a job, isn’t it?”</p><p>“Yes,” Kiyoomi replies, voice just as soft. “It is.”</p><p>He lands on the grass in a crouch in the most perfect landing he has ever managed. When he glances up at the window, Atsumu is leaning out watching with his chin in his palm, a slight smile on his face. </p><p>Kiyoomi hesitantly waves before running off into the night. </p><p> </p><p>Unfortunately, the information was easier to find than Kiyoomi had hoped (or maybe he’s telling himself that he had hoped it would be difficult.) When he climbs into Atsumu’s room, he has a detailed note stashed inside of his vest next to the job notice. He also has the bottle of bleach, just in case. </p><p>Atsumu is pacing, though he stops when Kiyoomi hops off of the windowsill. </p><p>“Well?” he asks, sounding hopeful. </p><p>Kiyoomi sighs and reaches into his vest to pull out the note. “I suppose you could do more with this information than I could.”</p><p>“What? Who is it?”</p><p>Atsumu rushes to Kiyoomi’s side, pressing himself close, closer than Kiyoomi would normally let anyone save his cousin get. But Atsumu is special despite Kiyoomi’s best wishes, and Kiyoomi might maybe shift a little closer himself. </p><p>He flips the note open and hands it over. Atsumu snatches it up and begins reading under his breath. </p><p>“Suna Rintarou,” Kiyoomi says, just as Atsumu says, “Oh my fucking gods.”</p><p>Kiyoomi blinks down at him. “Do you know him?”</p><p>“Know him? He’s fucking my brother,” Atsumu spits. He wrinkles the note in his hand and strides across the room, opening a cupboard and gesturing angrily inside. </p><p>A watermelon with a painted-on face stares Kiyoomi in the soul. </p><p>“Your brother is fucking a watermelon?” Kiyoomi asks. </p><p>“No, but Human Rin is,” Atsumu says. </p><p>“Ah.”</p><p>“I want you to kill him for me.”</p><p>“No, thank you.”</p><p>“C’mon! Isn’t it your job?” Atsumu whines.</p><p>Kiyoomi rolls his eyes and takes a seat on the edge of the bed, still looking at the watermelon. “Read the rest of the note before you start plotting murders.”</p><p>Atsumu frowns, but he sits next to Kiyoomi, very close to Kiyoomi, right against Kiyoomi, and he opens the note back up. </p><p>“I asked our intern for the direct transcript of the request,” Kiyoomi says. He wonders if it would be weird to stab a watermelon’s eyes out. “I think you’ll find that your watermelon boyfriend’s human counterpart had good intentions.”</p><p>“‘I want him to realize that he should actually keep some guards around’,” Atsumu murmurs. “‘I can’t always be there to protect him. Just send the worst guy you’ve got. I just want to make a point.’”</p><p>“Unfortunately, Hinata forgot to mention to dispatch that the request was for the worst assassin we have. I was sent out, and here we are,” Kiyoomi says. He pulls a knife out from his sleeve and holds it by the tip, judging how much force he would need to hit Watermelon Rin between the eyes. Not that much, presumably. “You’re a very lucky man, Miya. Gods know what would have happened if I went to the correct room the other night.”</p><p>“I stopped you with my pecs,” Atsumu says. </p><p>Kiyoomi nods. “You stopped me with your- Hold on.” He glares at Atsumu, who’s looking at him with a smirk. “You did not.”</p><p>“I did. You would’ve killed me if I wasn’t shirtless.”</p><p>“And pantless,” Kiyoomi adds. He blinks and shakes his head. “I was still going to kill you.”</p><p>“Nah, you’re a big softie,” Atsumu says. He looks on the verge of laughter. Kiyoomi, unfortunately, is beginning to feel much the same way. “‘Samu doesn’t sleep naked, by the way.”</p><p>“I didn’t ask.”</p><p>“You were wondering.”</p><p>“I wasn’t. And shouldn’t you be going next door to yell at your brother’s lover?” </p><p>“Yeah, yeah.” Atsumu stands and looks at the note in his hands, then at Kiyoomi, then at the knife in Kiyoomi’s hand. “You’re gonna stop coming around, now, aren’t you?”</p><p>Kiyoomi nods, hoping he doesn’t look as upset by the prospect as he feels. “I have no reason to keep coming.”</p><p>“Aren’t I reason enough?” Atsumu asks. He’s still looking at the knife. “We’re going back to the palace tomorrow.”</p><p>Kiyoomi frowns, his heart heavier than it should be. “That’s earlier than reported.”</p><p>“Well, the guards don’t want the heir to the throne in a city of assassins.” Atsumu shrugs. He finally looks up at Kiyoomi, still with that same smirk on his lips. Kiyoomi wants to kiss it. Him. He should stop. “Can you guess which one of us is the heir?”</p><p>Kiyoomi shakes his head with a shudder. “I would rather not. Frankly, neither of you sound reliable enough to rule a country, between your watermelon fucking-”</p><p>“Watermelon Rin is not my boyfriend!” Atsumu protests. </p><p>Kiyoomi ignores him and continues, putting his knife in his lap and counting off on his fingers, “Your lack of decency, your naivety, your plain idiocy, the fact that neither of you apparently allow yourselves to be guarded by anyone but the people you sleep with-”</p><p>“Again, Watermelon Rin and I are not a thing.”</p><p>“I’m not convinced of that. I saw the way your were spooning him the other night.”</p><p>Atsumu looks pained. “It was a joke! Human Rin bet me that I wouldn’t sleep with a watermelon for a week, and-”</p><p>Kiyoomi holds up a hand. “Does it look like I give a shit? Point is, neither of you are fit to rule. Your self-preservation instincts are out the window, and Human Rin sounds like he would be equally as useless as a second king in case he and Osamu get married.”</p><p>Atsumu pales. “Don’t mention them getting married. I have nightmares.”</p><p>“Point is… I don’t know which one of you is the heir. But it was idiotic of Human Rin to hire an assassin to scare a member of the royal family into protecting himself better.” Kiyoomi shakes his head, though he chuckles. Atsumu looks almost startled at the sound. “This is fucking ridiculous.”</p><p>“Yeah.” Atsumu smiles and leans against the wall with one arm, the other on his hip. “It is. Kita’s gonna hate hearing about this when we get home.”</p><p>Kiyoomi neither knows who Kita is, nor does he care. He does, however, want to stab this watermelon, so he picks his knife back up and throws it without a second thought. It, of course, lodges itself directly between the watermelon’s eyes. Atsumu pales slightly and swallows, standing back upright. </p><p>Kiyoomi himself stands to retrieve his knife. He wipes it on his towel, and slips it away. </p><p>“What time are you leaving tomorrow?” he asks, not quite knowing why, yet also directly knowing exactly why. Bad ideas. This week has been bad ideas central. </p><p>“Early in the morning,” Atsumu answers. “Why?”</p><p>He knows the reason why. Kiyoomi can see it in his eyes, the way they light up. He can see it in the way he steps closer and pulls Kiyoomi over with a tug on the drawstring of his cloak. He can definitely see it in the way his eyes flicker over Kiyoomi’s mask where his lips would be. </p><p>“No reason,” Kiyoomi says. He licks his lips and stares at Atsumu’s. “Shouldn’t you go and yell at Human Rin?”</p><p>“In a minute,” Atsumu mutters. “In a minute.”</p><p> </p><p>It takes more than a minute. </p><p> </p><p>Kiyoomi hasn’t seen Atsumu in the daylight before, and he has to stop and stare because <em>wow</em>. If he was beautiful in candlelight, he’s goddamn gorgeous in the sun. His muscles are covered with nice-looking traveling clothes, and his lips are still slightly swollen from the night before, and Kiyoomi can see a bruise at the base of his neck peeking over the collar of his tunic, but it’s fine. Great, even. </p><p>Atsumu doesn’t notice him until Kiyoomi steps beside him, seemingly manifesting from the shadows. </p><p>“I didn’t think you would actually come,” Atsumu says, voice low, minding the rest of the family loading into their respective carriages. There are four: one for the parents, one for the twins and Human Rin, and two decoy carriages in case of an attack on the road. Kiyoomi knows this. He nearly accepted a job to attack them on the road two weeks ago when news of their vacation had finally reached the city. </p><p>Atsumu is staring. Kiyoomi is also staring. Maybe they’re meant for each other, after all. </p><p>“Of course I came,” Kiyoomi scoffs. He crosses his arms and adjusts the bag on his shoulder so that it stops slipping. “And stop staring. You look like an idiot.”</p><p>“You aren’t wearing your mask,” Atsumu says. He’s still staring. So is Kiyoomi. </p><p>“It would be suspicious if I met your family looking like an assassin,” Kiyoomi mutters, wishing he still had his mask on to hide his growing blush. </p><p>Atsumu <em>beams</em>, reaching out and taking both of his hands in his. His hands are soft, Kiyoomi can tell even through his gloves. </p><p>“You’re kinda hot without it, you know,” Atsumu says. He wiggles his eyebrows. </p><p>Kiyoomi yanks his hands away and smacks Atsumu’s arm, turning to face the carriages. “Which one is ours, then?”</p><p>“Second from the back,” Atsumu answers. A pause, then, “Wait, you’re coming with us?”</p><p>“Of course I am. Someone has to keep your dumb ass from getting killed in the middle of the night,” Kiyoomi snaps. </p><p>“Omi-kun!” Atsumu cheers, attracting the attention of a foxlike man loading a trunk onto the back of the twins’ carriage. </p><p>Kiyoomi smacks Atsumu’s arm again. “My name is Sakusa. Use it.”</p><p>“Sure thing, Omi-kun.”</p><p>Suddenly, Kiyoomi regrets this decision. He could still go back to the guild. They won’t know he left for another fifteen minutes at least save Komori, who helped him pack the night before and only asked a few dozen questions. </p><p>The foxlike man walks over, hands in his pockets, and gives Kiyoomi a strange look. “Atsumu, who’s this?”</p><p>Kiyoomi saves Atsumu the embarrassment and bows slightly, balling his hand into a fist around the strap of his bag. “Sakusa Kiyoomi. This idiot’s new bodyguard.”</p><p>“Bodyguard?” Atsumu asks. Kiyoomi elbows him in the side, and Atsumu jumps. “Right! Yeah! This whole assassin thing kinda spooked me, y’know? I’m gonna tell ‘Samu to look into it when we get home.”</p><p>“Right,” says the man, not looking at all convinced. “Sure. Well, Omi-kun, it was a pleasure to meet you. I hope this trip treats us all well.”</p><p>Someone walks up next to the man, looking entirely too much like Atsumu for Kiyoomi’s comfort. </p><p>“Get your ass in the carriage, Rin,” he snaps, without malice in his voice. He then smacks Human Rin’s ass. Human Rin grins and practically skips to the carriage. Atsumu’s mouth twists into a disgusted grimace. “And keep your hands to yourself, ‘Tsumu. No canoodling on the way home.”</p><p>Atsumu rolls his eyes. “Sure, right, you keep to that, too. I don’t wanna see either of you so much as look at each other. It gives me cooties.”</p><p>“Cooties?” Kiyoomi tiredly asks. </p><p>Atsumu nods firmly. “Cooties.”</p><p>It’s Osamu’s turn to roll his eyes as he says, “Whatever. Hurry up. Ma’s worried about a sudden assassination attempt.”</p><p>“Tell her majesty that she doesn’t have anything to worry about,” Kiyoomi says. He straightens up, reaches into his pocket, and pulls his mask back on, pausing for a moment to breathe in deeply in relief. “I can guarantee that nothing will happen to you or your brother as long as I’m stuck watching him.”</p><p>Osamu nods, giving Atsumu a slightly-confused look, before following his lover into the carriage. </p><p>Atsumu laughs and elbows Kiyoomi in the side entirely too hard. Kiyoomi wheezes at the impact. </p><p>“C’mon,” he says, extending a hand that Kiyoomi hesitantly takes. “Let’s get this show on the road.”</p><p>Kiyoomi takes one look back at the city, sighs, and allows himself to be dragged to the carriage. Hopefully this isn’t a mistake. </p><p>(But as he settles next to Atsumu and listens to him tell Human Rin about the tragedy of his watermelon counterpart’s death at the hands of the assassin, Kiyoomi doesn’t believe it will be.)</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Follow me on <a href="https://twitter.com/hihoneyimdying?s=21">twitter</a> if you want for me complaining about my wips and previews of things to come.</p><p>Oh god it's late for me here, but like y'know I pounded this out in two hours and didn't edit it or look at it again, so I feel we're even here. </p><p>Catch me not doing tomorrow's prompt either lol rip</p></blockquote></div></div>
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